The Single Change That Made a Difference: The Way I Overcame After-Work Tension Through an Surprising Discovery in the Attic

I frequently become like a coiled spring after work. My shoulders grow tense, my breath turns fast and shallow. Typically, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut used to lead to the pop of a cork from a wine bottle, the wine hastily sploshed into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Later, several months back, I discovered my now-adult son’s old school recorder up in the loft. Curious, I blew into it, instantly reminded of the time it was the bane of my life – his daily rehearsals felt like an attack on my ears, the sharp sounds echoing in my mind long after he slept.

Instead of throwing it away, I brought it downstairs, along with a book – Very Easy Recorder Tunes. Growing up, I was the least musical child ever. I took recorder classes in primary school, yet never got to try other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and printed out a fingering chart. Looking up simple recorder songs, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it felt like a huge achievement.

My son asked what the hell I was doing (and please could I stop), but I persevered – I enjoyed the sensation the recorder gave me. Forgetting notes easily forced me to focus on the music sheet, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breathing slowed down, I was focused, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I was overjoyed. I had managed to play music.

Now, after some months, I can handle other children’s songs and a passable Ode to Joy. Yes, my rhythm is off, and I must jot down note names, but for me, it’s not about skill or being a musician – it’s purely about the joy it provides and how it clears my mind while playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which probably relieves parents, yet it made me wistful for my school years, and my son’s childhood.

I try to pick up my recorder every evening after work as my first activity, and in those 20 or so minutes, I escape into my own realm. Afterward, I feel totally energised and uplifted.

My friends think it’s hilarious, but one very wise therapist friend told me I was not only lowering my stress levels, but improving my cognitive skills, such as memory and auditory processing, which is invaluable at my time of life. For daily wellness, it’s truly an ode to joy.